This is the story of our weekend, and the loss of our baby Emily. As many of you know, this had been a problem pregnancy since Thanksgiving. I had been bleeding since the middle of October, and the doctors hadn't really been all that concerned as long as my bleeding didn't turn red. As long as it was brown, that meant the blood was old and for some reason some people just bleed. After an ultrasound, we found out that part of my uterus and placenta had not attached. Doctors once again said that this problem would most likely fix itself as the baby got bigger it would re-attach. Well, to make things worse, it showed up on the ultrasound that she had an echogenic bowel, which usually means Down Syndrome or Cystic Fibrosis. After all the tests the chances for Downs dropped and last Thursday we found out that I am not a carrier of CF.All the tests that they were running were coming back normal. Tuesday Blaine went out of town to CA for work. That night I lost a lot of blood so I called my Dr. Wednesday and asked them to check my H&H level. I went in and we got the results back on Thursday saying that it was at 7.8 which was low and to take some extra iron and we would retest when I came in for my next checkup. Friday morning I was feeling fine. Ryan and I were home alone while all the girls in the family went to the quilt show in PHX. My grandparents were going to bring by the Iron for me that they picked up from the store that afternoon. About 12:30 I started to not feel very good, and was having what I thought were Braxton Hicks. I let it go on for a while, but then around 3 I called my grandparents to have them take me to the hospital because the contractions were coming stronger and faster. I called the girls at the show to see if they were still in PHX because I was going to the hospital. So I called Gary at the shop and told him to send home Danny because I had to go. A few minutes later, Gary shows up, and my grandparents took me to the hospital. We found out my contractions were 4 min apart.
Apparently they saw something else going wrong and did an ultrasound. The Doc on call looked in my file and saw that I had had an ultrasound done by a high risk doc and called to consult with him. They saw that the baby had an echogenic bowel, which I said that we already knew, but now there was fluid around it.They decided to transfer me to a hospital that could handle an early baby. Previously, I called Blaine, who was in CA, and told him that I was going in, but that I was most likely nothing and that he didn't need to come home. He called his boss anyway, telling him that I was going in to the hospital. His boss told him to get his butt on a plane. Meanwhile back at the hospital, I found out that they were going to airlift me to St. Josephs hospital in Phoenix. I got to St. Joe's at about 6 and Blaine's plane landed at 7ish. Gary picked him up at the airport and I had my grandma tell Blaine to tell Gary to come also because I needed another blessing. Well, much of the next part of the story I don't remember, but has been filled in the past few days.
I guess I was doing really bad. My contractions were strong, and only 1 min apart. My blood was down to a 5, which basically means I didn't have any blood left. They started to give me the first unit of blood. Blaine and his dad got there. My grandma was already there with me, and I remember that shortly after Blaine got there that they told him that I had some sort of infection and that they could try and save the baby or me. I remember him asking if there was anything that they could do for the baby, but basically they told him they could deliver the baby and their was a very very small chance she could make it or they could save me but not both.
What a decision he had to make. Flying in, going to the hospital, walking in to see your wife out of it, and then be faced with that decision. I felt so bad that he had to go through that. I am really glad that his dad was there for him for a little support. That night things really went down hill. I got a fever of 104, and they had to put a cooling blanket under me to cool my temp. They gave me an epidural that took a few times to get in. I thought things would get better from there, but they didn't. The next morning after the new shift of docs came on, they said that they were going to break my water because things were taking too long. They needed to get the baby out. I had been on pitossin all night, and little had changed. I had also had about 2 bags of blood and a lot of antibiotics by this point. The next thing we know their are people their saying they are the rapid response team and they were taking me to Cardiac ICU. They took out my epidural, which I wasn't happy about, because I still hadn't delivered. They took me down to ICU and kicked Blaine out of the room while they moved me to my new bed. Blaine said they set him at the desk outside my room,and next to him there were a couple of Doctors trying to figure out how they were going to get the baby out. A nurse realized what was being said between the Docs and said that this was her husband. The Docs told Blaine well welcome to the think tank.
"You see,"they said," this is a Catholic hospital, and they don't train in taking a baby who isn't born c-section or normally." At this point we thought that she still had a heartbeat. When they checked me, the nurse yelled at the doctor to come quick. She thought she could see the baby's head, and a few seconds later Emily was born. Blaine barely made it into the room before she came out. You have to realize that I was about 40 years younger than any patient in that ICU, and I had just had a baby. These kinds of things rarely happen in the CARDIAC ICU. After this, I really don't remember much. They said that they were going to put in a central line( an IV that goes in your neck). The next thing I know, they said that they were going to give me some numbing medicine, and then I went to sleep.
I woke up with an IV in my neck, and didn't really knowing what was going on. My dad flew in from Pennsylvania, and had gotten here by this point. Later that afternoon, Blaine went home to take a shower and see Ryan. My dad stayed with me at the hospital. The only thing that I can remember is that they kept coming in and hanging more blood and meds on the pole next to my bed.
Sunday morning I was a little more coherent. They said that they were moving the whole ICU to a brand new floor. So we moved by lunch. I sent Blaine home that morning to get some better sleep while my dad was their with me. I thought while everyone was at church that he could get some sleep. I was feeling a lot better, and starting to get an appetite back, and getting more energy.
Sunday night I thought that I could send the boys home and do it on my own. I thought that they could go and have Sunday dinner with the family, and that Ryan probably needed his dad. That night was a hard night. I didn't get any sleep because it was so loud. By Monday morning, I was hungry because they forgot to bring me dinner. I was very happy to see my dad and Blaine bring me food.
Sunday, the ICU doctors said that the infection looked to be gone, and that I was doing really well, and that they would most likely move me back to Labor & Delivery sometime that day. By Monday I just wanted to go home. I was feeling better and I really wanted to see Ryan. I didn't want to go to L&D and see or hear any of the other babies. I just wanted to go home. So, after begging a lot of Doctors, they finally said that I could go home. I was so happy. I was so tired when I got home that I sat on the couch and Blaine brought Ryan to me and Ryan just grabbed me and gave me the biggest hug. It was one of the best feelings of my life. I took a shower and went to sleep.
This is the part of the story that Blaine and my dad didn't tell me till after I got out of the hospital. The doctor came in Sunday morning to do their rounds with the residents. After he came in and talked to me, they all went out in the hall. My dad went and stood by the door to hear what they were saying. The Doctor was telling his residents that he was really surprised to see me looking so well. He told the residents that he had not been sure I would make it until sometime late Saturday night.
This shows us that the power of the priesthood is so true. That through the priesthood anything can happen. We are very sad that Emily couldn't stay with our family here on earth, but we know that she is a member of our family. We always strive to live the best we can and fallow the teachings of the church. Now she gives our family that extra incentive to make sure that we do it. That way we can be with her again.
For anyone who is still reading, we just want to say thank you so very much for all the thoughts and prayers that you gave our family during this hard time.
Blaine and I just wanted to say thank you very much for all who have called and given us support during these past two weeks. As many of you know we buried our daughter Emily yesterday. We wanted to just keep it to manly family and some friends. Since most everyone else in our world thought that this was over like we did. Emily is now at the City of Mesa Cemetery. She is in one of the new infant sections. We had to get a bigger casket for her not just the normal preemie casket she was to long and big for one of those. We had to get a 19" casket since she was 14" long. It was such a nice day yesterday not to hot. We didn't have any type of service we just dedicated the grave and then sent everyone home and Blaine and I stayed to watch them close the grave. Blaine dedicated the grave and did a really good job with the prayer. He was really stressing out over it all week. This is not something that you plan on doing or even dream about dedicating your child's grave and he did really great and I was very proud of him. We have picked out her headstone and we can place it in three months after the ground settles. Thank you again for all of the love,support and financial help that so many of you have given us the past few weeks we couldn't of done it without you.
